Wednesday, November 4th, 2009
"Somebody, Nobody and Crazy" - e-Hawaii Joke
There were three guys and their names were Somebody Nobody and Crazy. They were all watching TV in da morning all da way 'til midnight. NOBODY got hungry and he told the other two guys he's gonna look for food in the kitchen so he ...
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Saturday, September 19th, 2009
"Samoan Lover" - e-Hawaii Joke
Q) What did the Samoan lover say to his Girlfriend while making love?
A) Hoo baypee kiff me "SAMOA" (Ooh Baby give me some more)
(Submitted via email by "Kris")
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Saturday, September 19th, 2009
"Samoan Light" - e-Hawaii Joke
Q) How many Samoans does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A) Ton't no te instrukshins hart to read.
(Submitted via email by "Kris")
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Saturday, September 19th, 2009
"Samoan In Reno" - e-Hawaii Joke
Q. How can you tell a Samoan guy is in Reno?
A. He's the one playing with the parking meters.
(Submitted via email by "no 'ita's")
"Tongan In Reno" - e-Hawaii Joke
Q. How can you tell a Tongan guy is in Reno?
A. He's waiting for his turn behind the ...
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Saturday, September 19th, 2009
"Samoan In Da Fire Lane" - e-Hawaii Joke
There was once a Samoan family who went to the store to do some grocery shopping. When they got to the store, the parking lot was full so da fathah say " Honey, you get off and do the shopping and I wait for ...
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Saturday, September 19th, 2009
"Samoan In A Bar" - e-Hawaii Joke
There was a Samoan man, a English man and a Maori man having a few beers in a Bar when this pretty chick walks in.
"If any of you guys can put liver and cheese in a sentence, I'll be yours forever".
So the Maori man quickly ...
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Saturday, September 19th, 2009
"Samoan Driver's License" - e-Hawaii Joke
A samoan man was applying for his driver's license and all he had to do was to have pink, green and yellow in one whole sentence: "Okay! I went home and I heard the phone go GREEN-GREEN so I PINK up the phone and say YELLOW!"
(Submitted via email ...
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Saturday, September 19th, 2009
"Samoan Car" - e-Hawaii Joke
Q: What is a Favorite Car Amongst Samoans?
A: Olds-mo-pill 4-4-2
(Submitted via email by "Dave")
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Saturday, September 19th, 2009
"Samoan Alcoholic" - e-Hawaii Joke
Did you hear about the Samoan alcoholic?
His name is "Meke falafa tasofa".
(Submitted via email by "not mike")
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Saturday, September 19th, 2009
"Robbed by an FOB" - e-Hawaii Joke
Q) How do you know when a FOBer has robbed your house?
A) When all the Sandals are missing.
(Submitted via email by "Julianna")
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Saturday, September 19th, 2009
"The Road to Hawaii" - e-Hawaii Joke
This man was walking along the beach in Southern California and discovered what appeared to be a Genie's lamp. He picked it up and rubbed it and sure enough, out came this Genie. The Genie was so excited to be out of the lamp that ...
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Saturday, September 19th, 2009
"Reggae Musician with Glasses" - e-Hawaii Joke
Q) What do you call a reggae musician with glasses?
A) Rasta Four-eyes
(Submitted via email by "John")
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Sunday, August 23rd, 2009
"You Know You Are Japanese-American If..." - e-Hawaii Joke
You know that Camp doesn't mean a cabin in the woods.
The men in your family were gardeners, farmers or produce workers.
The women in your family were seamstresses, domestic workers or farm laborers.
Your Issei grandparents had an arranged marriage.
One of your relatives was a ...
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Friday, February 27th, 2009
"You Know You're From Hawaii If..." - e-Hawaii Joke
You buy large quantities of toilet paper in case there's a longshoreman strike...
You don't understand why anyone would buy less than a 20 lb bag of rice...
You would serve spam as a meat for dinner...
You can taste the difference between teriyaki and kal-bi
You ...
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Friday, February 27th, 2009
"U Know U Local Eef" - e-Hawaii Joke
You have a separate circuit breaker for your rice cooker/warmer.
Only NOW you know that cilantro is the same as Chinese parsley.
You measure the water for the rice by the knuckle of your index finger.
You know which market shave poi on which days.
You know that ...
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Sunday, January 4th, 2009
"Raising Samoans" - e-Hawaii Joke
Q) How come Samoan Mothers have big arms and necks?
A) Cause they gotta raise their kids!
(Submitted via email by "Dave")
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Wednesday, December 3rd, 2008
"Hawaii's Golf Truisms" - e-Hawaii Joke
SOME SURE BETS -
The rake is always in the other trap
The rough will be mown tomorrow.
The wind is in your face on 16 of the 18 holes.
You always have the honor on a tricky par 3.
Nothing straightens out a nasty slice quicker than a sharp dogleg ...
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Wednesday, December 3rd, 2008
Rap Reiplinger - "Auntie Marialani's Cooking Show" from Rap's Hawaii - e-Hawaii Joke
Below is the amusing "Auntie Marialani's Cooking Show" video - from Rap's Hawaii - performed by Rap Reiplinger. Video compliments of YouTube. Enjoy!
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Wednesday, December 3rd, 2008
"Sound of a Filipino Dog" - e-Hawaii Joke
Q) What did the Filipino dog sound like when it ran into a wall?
A) Doog!
(Submitted via email by "Pok Head")
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Wednesday, December 3rd, 2008
"Glenn's Baggage Claim" - e-Hawaii Joke
One day one Portuguese lady named Mrs. Medeiros was waiting for her dog at the airport and they didn't bring it out. She went to the baggage claim and asked the clerk, Glenn "where's my dog? I've been waiting half-hour already!" Glenn, said "Hold on ma'am ...
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Wednesday, December 3rd, 2008
"Help Da Kanaka" - e-Hawaii Joke
Keoki is in bed with his wife, Nani when there is a knocking on the door. He rolls over and looks at his clock, and it's half past three in the morning.
"I not going get out of bed now," he thinks, and rolls over. Then, ...
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Wednesday, December 3rd, 2008
"Blind Portuguese Man" - e-Hawaii Joke
One day while cruising Wall Mart I saw this blind Portuguese guy walking towards me as he was being pulled by his "Seeing Eye" dog. Suddenly he pulled the dog off the floor by it's leash as it choked and started swinging it around in a ...
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Wednesday, December 3rd, 2008
"No Look Good" - e-Hawaii Joke
One day, a farmer's horse had died and he needed another horse to pull his plow.
As the farmer was walking down the road, he saw a horse eating grass in the pasture and questioned the owner. "How much money would you like for that horse?"
The Filipino ...
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Wednesday, December 3rd, 2008
"King Of the Jungle: The Sequel" - e-Hawaii Joke
... As the lion kept on ragging on all the other animals, the hyena and the rhino was talking. "Eh! Rhino, brah I tired of hearing the lion's stink mouth saying 'who da man, who da man.' brah das bull shit. We ...
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Wednesday, December 3rd, 2008
"Cheese" - e-Hawaii Joke
Q) What do you call cheese that's not yours?
A) Nacho Cheese, brah!
(By Shan age 11)
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